“I recently came to the conclusion that 7-11 sucks ass. Although as a confession, I came to that realization over many, many years. As a freelance writer, I work at home and often under so many deadlines that I rarely have time to go out and get a decent lunch, and I’m not what you’d call a whiz in the kitchen.
So, I used to walk to my neighborhood 7-11 quite a bit, and had many of their tuna sandwiches and cold drinks. Recently I stopped in to get some water, and the line was ridiculous. While I stood there, I glanced around and was smacked in the face by the question “Why are you in this place?”
There were 420heads buying flavored cigars to make blunts, two blonde bimbettes with ginormous fake boobs and whale tails in line arguing about which lip gloss was best, and someone trying to purchase 48 different scratch-off lotto cards with an out of state third party check or something. I tried to find ONE single healthy thing on the shelves while I waited, and basically came up with only the water that I was holding already. I’d had enough.
Besides, on this stretch of 1.7 miles on Tujunga Avenue in NoHo, there are 4… count ‘em FOUR 7-11s, all in a row: Ventura and Tujunga, Moorpark and Tujunga, Camarillo/Riverside and Tujunga, and Magnolia and Tujunga. Do we really need that many 7-11s? Can people drive more than a half mile in search of one?
I have to admit, I hit a 7-11 on Saturday since it was Free Slurpee Day, and hence them getting two stars. However, behind the register I noticed that they now sell video games, boner pills, digital cameras, and iPod cases. I give up.
Of course, I’ll probably have to amend this when I have some sort of junk food jones at 3am one night, but I’m just sayin’. Four stores in less than two miles. Good grief.”
-Kevin K.,a reviewer at Yelp.
I’ve decided to start blogging about reasons to hate 7-11. I’ve only been in a 7-11 a handful of times, and every single time it was a bad experience. I think it might be the type of crowd the place attracts. Whatever the case, I refuse to go to 7-11 if there are any other options available. I ESPECIALLY refuse to go to the one near the convention center in Baltimore. Ugh.